A Message To My Child by @Donna_Fasano #Parenting

Navigating the river called #parenting isn’t easy. When you were young, we laughed as we splashed in the babbling brook of life. We explored the shallows, marveled at the iridescent minnows, turned over rocks to find red salamanders, constantly curious and awed by our discoveries. I paddled through the current, steering you this way or that, always going in the direction I thought was best.

#Parenting

Time passed, and your urge to test your paddling skills grew. So, for a short while, we shared in the chore. Rains came, and the river widened and deepened. Storms billowed in the clouds overhead, rousing a choppy current that felt scary, even dangerous. The sun rose and calm returned. Such is life on the river.

#Parenting Realization…

I slowly came to the realization that it was time to step out of the canoe, hand over the paddle, allow you to navigate your own way. In that instant, the river’s name changed to Life, and it became yours. Sometimes, watching from the shoreline is excruciating. It is during those moments I force myself to remember that I did my very best during our together years to teach you when to battle the current, when to drift with it, and, if need be, how to swim. Most times, though, I am astonished by your strong, confident strokes, your keen sense of piloting.

You are on the right course; of this I am certain. I am confident in your ability to judge the ebb and flow of Life. I am sure you know your vessel, the strength of its keel, the weight of its anchor, the location of its grab rails, the cut of its wake. You’ve got this, come sunshine or squall.

I will try to relax, but I can’t promise to do so. I’m a parent, remember. And I love you. If you should ever need me, I am here. But in my heart, I know you have your bearing. I know you will find your flow and do well on this journey.

Watching your child become an adult

Like many of you, I marvel at how quickly time passes. It moves every quicker when you watch your child grow. Once sweet innocent babies, they grow into nosy toddlers almost overnight. Then on to being energetic and curious children, before moody adolescents desperately trying to find themselves and become young adults. It all seems to happen in the blink of an eye instead of years.

I have two children, and I had my first one when I was twenty-one. My second came thirteen years later. My oldest, a boy, has two children of his own. I often wonder when he became old enough to have a career, wife, children, and a home? I watch and listen from the sidelines as my son and his family go through stages of life that I can fondly remember doing myself with him.

My daughter just finished her first year of college, and as I listen to her stories, watch her movements, and her reactions, I am reminded that my little girl is no longer a baby, but a beautiful young lady, on the verge of being a full-blown woman. To some, she might already be a woman, but I still see tiny bits and pieces of her innocence of youth. I still hear the curiosity to understand simple things in life that tells me she still has much to learn. Not that we ever stop, but you get what I mean.

We just helped my daughter buy her first car, and to witness her signing the paperwork, was a sight to see. I asked her how she felt afterward, and she said that it made her feel important, and she felt the weight of it as she signed the document and then sat back, going wow, I just did that. Proud but scary at the same time. I can relate. Remember your first car? What about your mortgage? It is scary.

This summer, our family will probably enjoy one of our last family vacations. Now that my daughter is growing up, she has plans for herself. She has people to see and places to be. We are lucky that she still feels we are important enough to spend quality time with us. Or perhaps it’s just the lure of a beach. Either way, I will take it and enjoy every moment I can before she is off living her own life with a career, home, and family.

Then the nest really will be empty, and I’ll sit back and wonder where the time went. Actually, no, I won’t. I’ll be too busy writing happy stories about people growing up, finding love, and starting their lives—just like my children.

Want to read about siblings growing up and finding love? Make sure to check out my Loving a Young Series on Amazon.

Holidays Decorations

Most of us decorate our houses for Christmas and the holidays. I get my fake tree up the first weekend of December to put myself in the holiday mood.

But do you decorate your house for other holidays?

My daughter has made it a tradition to decorate for Halloween and Thanksgiving. Spiders and pumpkins are set in the front yard, at the door, and in the living room.

Three years ago, when I screamed after hitting my head against a spider dangling from a lamp in the kitchen, the kids squealed in delight, and made sure they multiplied their cute decorations—I call them disgusting.

Two days before Halloween, my grandchildren invite a dozen of friends who arrive in costume and with a pumpkin to carve and decorate in the backyard. Pizza is served to the hard-working artists and at the end of the party, they fill their basket with candies.

On the following weekend, the Halloween decorations disappear in a plastic container and the Thanksgiving ones come out. This time the celebration is a family gathering with adults and children around a big table. During the traditional dinner of turkey, green beans and sweet potatoes, and dessert of pumpkin pies and pecan pies, each guest, grandparents, parents and children take turns telling us what they are most grateful for.

Setting traditions and building memories is important to raise happy children according to my daughter, a pediatrician who knows her business.